Embracing Multiple Truths

 

Ever wonder why we’re all so convinced that our version of reality is the reality? It’s like we’re all tiny vacuum cleaners, sweeping up bits of life experience and saying, “Yup, this is it, I’ve seen the world.” But let’s be real: what we’ve seen is basically the equivalent of staring at life through a keyhole. We grow up in one spot, with our limited little slice of experience, and before we know it, we build an entire worldview from there. It’s like thinking your hometown diner is the best restaurant ever—until you realize there’s a world of food beyond Mom’s meatloaf special.

But here’s the kicker: while we’re stuck in our heads, thinking we’ve got it all figured out, fields like science, literature, and philosophy show us there’s way more out there. They’re like a window letting us peek outside the keyhole, showing us, “Hey, buddy, your take on the world? Yeah, it’s not the only one.” It’s kind of like realizing not everyone thinks pineapple on pizza is a crime against humanity (though… some of us still hold that position).

So, our brains—they’re a real trip. We pop into the world half-baked, with a basic genetic recipe, and then life starts doing the rest of the cooking. What this means is, depending on where and when we’re born, and who’s doing the raising (shout out to your weird uncle who thinks it’s fine to microwave fish at the office), our brains wire up differently. We’re like little software programs that update based on the time, place, and culture we grow up in.

But wait, there’s more. I’m into something I call “perceptual genomics,” which is just a fancy way of asking, “How do your genes make you see the world differently from me?” It’s like this: picture an ant crawling on a red-and-white tablecloth toward a jar of purple jelly. Some people will see that scenario play out in full HD in their heads, while others get… nothing. It’s all thanks to how our brains and genes are wired. Some of us are running on the latest version of imagination software, and others? Well, maybe they need an update.

Now, one of the quirks of being human is that our brains love forming groups—ingroups and outgroups. Back in the day, this made sense. If you were in a tribe, it was smart to trust your own folks and side-eye the people across the hill who you didn’t know. Today? We still do it, but it’s about sports teams, religions, countries, and yes, even pizza toppings. We care more about people who are in our ingroups, and we’re more suspicious of everyone else. It’s why you’ll bond instantly with someone who shares your love of ‘The Office,’ but keep your distance from that neighbor who’s always trimming their hedges way too early on weekends.

And here’s where things get fascinating—and a little messed up. Our sense of empathy? It’s not spread out equally. We care more about people in our ingroups, and less about the “outsiders.” There was this experiment where people watched hands on a screen get poked with a Q-tip or stabbed with a needle. And guess what? When an ingroup hand got stabbed, the empathy lights in the brain lit up like a Christmas tree. But when it was an outgroup hand? Meh, not much action. It’s not that we’re cold-hearted—it’s just the brain doing what it’s done for centuries. But it’s also why groups who hate each other can dehumanize one another so easily. To them, the other side isn’t even fully human—they’re like NPCs in a video game.

So, what do we do with all this? Well, step one is admitting that we’re all walking around with some serious blind spots. We’re biased, every one of us. But there are ways to work around that. Orchestras figured this out years ago. They started holding auditions behind a screen, so all they could hear was the music—no biases about gender, race, or whatever. And guess what? The best musicians started getting picked.

Another strategy? Learn the tricks of dehumanization so you can be immune to them. For example, there’s something called “moral pollution,” where you associate people with something gross or wrong just because they’re in your outgroup. Once you see that tactic, you can fight against it like a bias-busting superhero.

But if you really want to break down barriers, here’s the secret: find something you have in common. Like dogs? Me too! You surf? Awesome! Before you know it, you’re bonding with someone who might’ve been in your outgroup five minutes ago. And even if you later find out you disagree about something (like, I don’t know, pineapple on pizza), that bond means you’ll at least be curious about their perspective instead of writing them off as the enemy.

In the end, we all experience reality differently. Our brains are wired that way. But the more we can connect on deeper levels, the more we’ll start seeing each other as fellow humans, not just ingroup or outgroup members. And maybe, just maybe, we’ll build a world where everyone agrees that microwaving fish at the office should be banned. Forever.

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